P.S.
Happy birthday Leanne...
Whoever she is, there was a big flap about Leanne’s 21st the other day. Her birthday was proudly announced on a duvet cover that had been tied to the railings near to the back entrance of the New Malden Tesco in Burlington Road.
There it was for all to see, blowing about in the breeze. Maybe Leanne works at Tesco. Or it could be that she lives opposite. Would it be likely her family had organised a birthday treat for her actually in the Tesco coffee bar? Unlikely, we think.
However, full marks to her loving family or friends who devised the greeting. OK, so it’s not a message throbbing along the dazzling lights of London’s Piccadilly Circus or New York’s Times Square. But it’s the thought that counts. And what a lovely curly Y on Happy.
So, hope it was a good one, Leanne.
Have you spotted anything locally that amused or interested you? Let us know (preferably with a photo): mail@motspurpark.info
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The strain of signwriting...
Tin of red paint at the ready, brush poised, dip it in and go! It should be so easy, you’d imagine.
But after just four letters – OK, four and a half to be more precise – the signwriter at this station minicab office seems to have run out of energy.
Was it the heat? Did he or she become overcome by fumes from the paint? Or perhaps standing on a stool or chair or even a wobbly ladder to reach the required height summoned the ‘elf ‘n’ safety brigade to talk them back down to the ground.
Or possibly, maybe, the person with the paintbrush just forgot what they were supposed to be writing. Or didn’t know how to spell it.
Heat... Heathrow? We can only guess. And what could come next? Will it be Gat? Cit? Stan? Watch this space – literally.
Anyone for badminton...
While we’re near a certain landmark minicab office, this unusual object lodged in its guttering has been a mystery for some time now.
Just who would be playing badminton on the station stairway in the first place? And did a puff of wind simply carry their shuttlecock away on the breeze?
Such minor items can cause havoc to a building’s guttering system. However, it looks in this case as though the build-up of leaves and other detritus necessary before it would become a problem has not yet occurred.
Which also means there is still time for the owner of the shuttlecock to lean over and retrieve it – and continue their match.
Being so close to the half-finished sign, maybe an enterprising soul could attend to both matters.
Mystery of the blue pipe...
Motspur Park Station users may have spotted that a strange – and, it has to be said, ugly – blue pipe has suddenly appeared, snaking across the footbridge.
The one-inch diameter tubing runs along the top of the station wall into the structure behind the cafe.
At the staircase end it has been clumsily lashed to the bridge and ends up burrowing into the undergrowth between the taxi office and the disused public toilets.
So what is it for? Word has it the taxi people fancied a supply of coffee on tap, literally. Another theory is that the cafe folk needed a little, erm, relief pipe.
Or it’s a speaking tube, as on ships before intercoms were invented, for taxi and cafe workers to chat.
I prefer these reasons to the one given: “A temporary replacement for a broken water supply.” Borrrring.
Man the footbridge! Guard the gasometers!
A rumble from beyond the Sir Joseph Hood fields... Is that a whiff of cordite? Worcester Parkites have “stumbled upon” our “cracking little website” and are threatening “some kind of expedition” to their “neighbouring little town” (that’s us).
“We might even be able to open trade links (we can go armed with lace and ribbons from Broadway Bargains and perhaps some inkjet refill kits from Mr Ink),” writes one.
A blogger called ‘axlrocky’ replies: “I say befriend them and then we can use them in a military insurgency against Old Malden and take back the other side of the bridge and parts of the Avenue and Green Lane which have been greedily swallowed up by Kingston! They could provide a great rear-gaurd action!”
Minigee says: “Could we organise a Motspur Park / Worcester Park FreeTake exchange in order to expedite friendly relations? We could take their Christmas Tree stand in return for our KFC...” Click here to spy on their plans.
Just the ticket
Ah, there it is. I knew I’d put that ticket somewhere safe. Isn’t it funny how you forget where that “safe” hiding place is? Especially when you’re only a child.
However, while the train service from Waterloo to Motspur Park (or Malden) is still with us, sadly the railway company is not. Nor are third-class carriages.
Southern Railway was established in 1923. It was an amalgamation of several smaller companies, linking London with the Channel ports, South-West England and Kent until it was nationalised in 1948.
The rolling stock was painted a bright malachite green above a black frame and it ran several famous trains including the Brighton Belle and the Golden Arrow. We don’t think there was a Motspur Park Meteor…
Bidding on eBay for this fragment of railway history ran until 19 October, 2010. You could follow it here.
Children’s apostrophe – a sign of the times?
Never let it be said we’re pedants here at MotspurPark.info but when we spotted New Malden Library had a sign for its “Childrens Library” there was a momentary wail. Staff said the absent apostrophe had been mentioned, but nothing could be done. Ah, a challenge! Perhaps we could sneak in with a ladder and felt-tip pen… or simply fill in a form.
A month later, neighbourhood library manager Adam Moore emailed: “Many thanks for your comment card regarding a missing apostrophe on the sign indicating our children’s library. I can only blame ill-educated sign writers, but must admit I had never noticed its absence before, perhaps some kind of temporary blindness from being here every day, and with my being quite a grammar pedant this is most unusual. Nevertheless, you will be pleased to hear that the apostrophe has now returned to its (not it’s) rightful place.”
Who knows, maybe a correct apostrophe on the future CV of one of today’s young library users will bring career success. ● Campaigns for apostrophe lovers and haters.
Fir goodness sake...
Some folk take down their fairy lights as soon as the relatives have been and – just as importantly – gone, and the turkey sandwiches have fizzled out.
Then there are those who prefer to hang on to the last vestiges of festive fun long after the twelfth night has prompted the rest of us to pack away the paper chains for another year.
However, this observer was astonished to see council workmen still collecting Christmas trees well into the second week of February.
And judging by the load mounting up in the back of this Merton recycling truck, which was turning into West Barnes Lane, quite a few people have been hanging on to theirs fir dear life.
At least the collection scheme saves us from the sad sight of Christmas trees rotting away on doorsteps.
Is that wheely what it appears to be?
It’s gone midnight and not a soul is around. The only sound to be heard along the deserted road is a muffled echo from one’s own footsteps, bouncing back from each slumbering house you walk past.
A ghostly, bewitching hour, when your mind can wander freely as you stride along the dark, chilly streets.
But what’s that ahead, silhouetted against the gleam of streetlights reflected by a damp pavement? It looks like a… It can’t be… Oh yes, it is. A wheelchair.
How the…? Why…? Who…? It’s just standing there, as though its occupant has jumped up, realising – as though from a Lou and Andy sketch in TV’s Little Britain – they no longer need for it. Or a biblical scene in which a miracle cure has suddenly made the chair redundant.
So how did it come to be left in Blenheim Road in the early hours? Alas, this question awaits a wheely good answer…
Long stop and you’re shopped...
Save a few bob* here, a couple of bob off there. Lots of offers and vouchers and ways to make your pennies go further... Unless, that is, you take too long pushing your trolley up and down Tesco’s tempting aisles.
They might well say “Every little helps”, but try on too many clothes, spend too long chatting over a Mocha Italia Espresso in the new Costa or flick through too many magazines or papers and you’ll land a £70 fine.
Actually, you’d have to be going some to stretch out your visit to the New Malden 24-hour hypermarket longer than 180 minutes. May as well move in.
But should you even think of such a leisurely visit, best that you leave the motorised carriage at home and jump on Shanks’s pony... Or else Highview Parking Ltd will have your number (plate).
* bob = a shilling (5p). Not a lot. But every little helps.
Knitted Kate and Woolly William tie the knot
Royal Wedding fever comes to Motspur Park – not only are Seaforth Avenue and Marina Avenue having street parties, but the couple themselves are putting in an appearance in Arthur Road.
Hatmaker Sarah McAlister has offered MotspurPark.info an exclusive preview of The Dress and can reveal that Kate will wear her hair up.
“I made them as a bit of a laugh – and to wind up my children, which worked – from a book entitled Knit Your Own Royal Wedding by Fiona Goble,” says Sarah. “It has patterns for all of the Royal Family, the Archbishop of Canterbury, footmen and even corgis. I have only done Kate and Wills and am halfway through the Queen, who will be wearing green, by the way.”
With journalist Jan Moir later revealing her own knitted Royals in the Dail Mail, perhaps nimble-fingered Sarah has started not just a new sideline but a whole new trend.